When we are children we are so desperate to grow up, but there are always lapses when the joy of childhood just can’t be suppressed. ‘Act your age’ we are told in a scolding tone, implying that we should be upping our mental age to match that of our chronological age.
Like many things in the cycle of life there comes a time when everything gets flipped on its head. If you’ve been ‘feeling old’ lately it might be time that your mental age became lower than your chronological age.
When I ask friends in their 80s and 90s how old they feel, they tell me they don’t feel much different to when they were younger, it’s just that their body has other ideas. So it seems that we are naturally inclined to think that the person we are hasn’t changed that much. While that is true in our mind, we don’t necessarily put it into action. The risk as we get older is that we become more socially isolated and less willing to try new things.
One of the best things you can do is to stay connected with people especially those younger than you. In many cultures extended families living together provide the inclusiveness and stimulation of relationships spanning generations. However, if you live in a society where older people live independently well into their golden years, often on their own, you are going to need to continually build new relationships as you age.
Don’t let your age be a barrier to trying something new, or worry about being the oldest in the group or class. I currently do a sport where the instructors are younger than my children, but that doesn’t bother me because they are better at that sport than I am. In some cases we started in the same class, but because I was more risk adverse and couldn’t afford to have a serious injury, they progressed faster than me. So here I am doing a mentally and physically challenging sport in a lesson where I am the oldest, and the youngest last week was 10!
If it is something physical you have in mind I’m not talking about throwing all caution to the wind and going out and doing risky things. If the body is not currently up to what you have planned then you will need to start gently and build up. Avoiding injury is so important, as getting injured will take you in the opposite direction of your goal, and may even cause a loss of confidence or motivation that will trash the goal altogether.
Here are some recommendations so you can act your mental age not your chronological one:
- Actively seek out new experiences, events and activities. You could even join me in my New Year’s resolution to try 5 new things I have never done before.
- Stay externally focussed by keeping up with news, researching the latest on topics that interest you and engaging in conversations on a wide range of topics when you get the chance.
- If you are feeling hesitant about joining a group, take a friend with you.
- Don’t be worried if an activity is ‘age-appropriate’. Think more about how it fits in with who you are or want to be.
- Say yes to invitations from lots of different people so you expand your social connections.
- Stay physically fit so you have the energy to keep up with your mind.
Photo by Alex Harvey 🤙🏻 on Unsplash
Heather Ogden-Handa
Good to meet you! I’m a marketer and writer interested in aging and longevity. I see lots of great information out there, so I’m keen to share topics that take my interest. Over time I hope the knowledge and community around this blog will have a positive impact on the healthy lifestyles of many individuals.